They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize