the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
