does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
