Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
