She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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