I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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