So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
