I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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