in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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