I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
