Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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