elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
