Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
