He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
