You work out of a Hotel?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize