I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
