I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
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