You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
