Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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