I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
