Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize