Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?