I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize