He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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