I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize