yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize
