I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
