My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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