I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize