no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
