please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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