Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
