white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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