Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
