I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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