you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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