Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
