im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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