I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
