i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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