dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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