You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
