hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
