You really coming over, don't trick.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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