Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
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my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
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Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
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