A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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