I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
