Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
