I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
