Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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