I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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